A small perk of living alone is that one has the freedom to enjoy a bit of guilt-free slobbiness now and then. If I don’t feel like cleaning up the spilled chocolate protein powder on my kitchen counter right away—no problem. A few emptied-out plastic Lean Cuisine trays strewn about my study? Eh, I’ll gather those up for the trash tomorrow. And my dirty dishes from breakfast? They can sit by the sink until after work.
This usually isn’t a problem as I have had a dearth of six-legged guests for years (or at least they have been smart enough to stay out of sight). My luck ran out a few days ago, though. They finally found me, their little black segmented bodies swarming over my house. One even dared to make his way up my bare leg while I was watching television. An instinct-driven sweet tooth I can maybe forgive, but invading my personal space?!? Hell, no.
Sometimes revenge can be sweet. Especially when it comes in the form of borax-laced sugar syrup. Terro has to be one of the most fun insecticides out there. You put a few drops on a piece of cardboard. The ants discover the conveniently laid out feast. They gorge themselves, taking plenty back to feed to the rest of their colony and their queen. Then their numbers slowly diminish, until not a single antennae peaks out though the cracks between the floorboards.
It’s probably anthropomorphising too much to ponder whether the ants were wondering to themselves why there have been so many dead bodies lying around the colony lately…oh well, this sugar syrup tastes really good…
Looks like I can go back to being a slob again.